“There was so little concern,” King says. “There was a freedom and there wasn’t a worry definitely not the way it is now,” Webb says. Sexual freedom or promiscuity wasn’t seen as “dirty.” Sex was ubiquitous and worry-free in the absence of significant health threats like HIV. Yeah, you might get some STD, but it was usually something you could take a little pill and it would be gone in 10 days.”
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Of course, we didn’t think about that cute little phrase, ‘going out and looking for husbands.’ We were just going out and looking for sexual partners and I was always jealous because he ended up with the best-looking guys in the bars.” Sex without fearĭespite the fear of social rejection or, in worst-case scenarios, public or legal condemnation, King and Webb both recount a sense of comfort, ease and freedom in gay men’s sexual culture. “He and I would go out and look for husbands with each other - or dates, rather. King, meanwhile, in his 30s at the time, says he had the good fortune of living in Charlotte with a first cousin. “I didn’t know it, but he had seen me at Scorpios and kept asking in a roundabout way, ‘Did I see you in a club sometime? Maybe a club over on Freedom Dr.?’ It was very much coded. “I remember one of my roommate’s friends came over,” Dave says. On campus, Webb and other gay acquaintances treaded lightly.
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I used to know guys who would go to Scorpios and back their cars into the parking space so no one would happen to notice their license plates.” “It was still one of those things, not like today with Lady Gaga and ‘Born This Way,’ that just because of the social norms there was still very much a sense, I don’t know, of doing something bad. “I wasn’t open and out to my roommates,” says Webb. Yet, like King, Webb still lived in silence among his straight peers. “The first time I went to Scorpios was in 1974,” Webb says. He, too, remembers the sense of community in the gay bars. My life in the early ‘70s revolved primarily around gay bars.”ĭave Webb, 57, was 20 years old when he began college at the University of North Carolina-Charlotte in 1975. “Oleens, was already open and was thriving,” King says.
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In Charlotte, King found a more open community, though gay bars still played a central role. The move, King says, was out of self-preservation. Not long after meeting his wig shop friend, King found himself in Charlotte, a move prompted after a co-worker noticed his car parked at the home of the wig shop employee. “Of course, that had been going on for years, but I was just becoming aware of it.”
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“I started getting more and more aware that there seemed to be a fairly large number of gay people and that they made accommodations for their own social lives,” says King. An insular social sceneĪt the time, the gay community was insular, but friendly - centered mostly around small, underground gay bars, close friends and private parties. “Being openly gay was rare, in my experience, especially in mainstream employment.” “At the newspaper, I never came out to anybody,” King says, noting most of his friends at the time were never out, either. Once my wife and I separated and I had sex with this guy, I realized where I truly belonged.”ĭespite King’s newfound sense of acceptance, fears still abounded.
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He was the first guy I’d ever had real sex with. “And, in the meantime, he and I had had sex. “It was such a fine experience,” King says. He was the first gay man I ever really had a decent conversation with.”Įventually, he and the man visited a gay bar in Chapel Hill, King’s first outing to such a bar. “I took him back home and we must have sat in front of his house and talked for two hours. “He was invited over to a party I had at my house that included primarily straight folks, but he came with the wife of this other sports writer,” he recounts. King says he and the man became close after he attended a party at King’s home.